The Peace Rug Story:
How 750 Kids Learned to Get Along in Two Weeks

In 1999, no single curriculum was available to meet state requirements for conflict resolution, anger management, communication skills, interpersonal skills, bullying prevention, character education, and cultural diversity issues.

School Counselor and Counseling Psychologist Dr. Helen McIntosh wanted life skills in these areas, since many children witness and possibly experience domestic abuse, violence, and neglect; many came to school hungry and had other difficulties.

She believed that children should be equipped to speak up for themselves, since seldom in life" does one have a facilitator or mediator to settle disputes. She wanted children to know how to solve their own problems without adult intervention, and wanted students to "find their voice" and not be intimidated by others.

The solution came with the development of The Peace Rug curriculum in September, 1999. More than 100 staff members of Dr. McIntosh’s school unanimously gave her permission to test her new concept with 750 students. After two weeks, all students were trained to use The Peace Rug, and teachers reported there were no more unresolved conflicts in their classrooms. Students even referred themselves to The Peace Rug when a problem arose. There was peace throughout the school - even on the playground.

Students asked, "Could we do this at home? I fight with my brothers and sisters all the time." Days later, they reported, "We don't fight anymore, and we ask Mom and Dad to go to Rug so that they won't fight, either!"

Because other teachers and parents asked to purchase The Peace Rug, this unique, based and proven effective curriculum is now widely available.

Dr. Helen’s Personal Story

Glasses, braces, being picked on and being excluded. You name it and it happened to I was growing up. Maybe that's your story, too. But, the biggest, longest, and worst hurt was having an extremely difficult relationship with my mother that lasted until she died in 1998. It's difficult to admit but she was a bully.

Often and unprovoked, she would explode in anger and use words like fists against me. It was painful and I felt defenseless - even as an adult. Sometimes I coped by trying to be funny and laugh away her comments, but the hurt and the injury to me were still there. Sometimes I would become silent; sometimes I walked away; sometimes I just went numb but always there were tears. Whoever said sticks and stones may break your bones but words will never hurt you was totally wrong. Words sometimes hurt worse - bruises and cuts heal - but wounds made by angry and spiteful words stay open in the heart and may never get well. My goal became to "find my voice."

Soon after she died, I thought about my 750 students at the school where I served as school counselor and how they suffered from similar, if not worse, situations with their parents and even older brothers and sisters. I knew that they, too, had to "find their voice" and to be able to stop their bullies from continuing to hurt them.

All of this led me to create The Peace Rug in 1999. The missing words that I needed in order to "find my voice" with Mom became the language of The Peace Rug. I'll never know for sure if The Peace Rug could have made a difference between my Mom and me, but I certainly believe that it would have.

The Peace Rug is dedicated to her.